Counseling for Twin Parents
Is Life With Two Babies Becoming Unmanageable?
May the loneliness that comes from being a twin parent in a sea of singletons (who don’t know how easy they have it!) has intensified, or reality has set in now that the babies are home from the hospital. You may be dealing with the intense physical and emotional demands of recovering from pregnancy and birth while caring for two babies at once. Perhaps you feel like you’re drowning and grasping for a life raft to get you through the next 24 hours.
Feeling Constantly Guilty That You Can’t Give Either Baby Your Full Attention
Life as a twin parent means you’re constantly pulled in two directions, which can lead to guilt when you can’t attend to both babies’ needs at one time. You need a clone of yourself to get through the days and nights! Secretly, you wonder if you would be a better parent if you only had one baby to take care of at a time.
You’re not alone if you’ve been feeling isolated and disappointed that your family and friends aren’t helping as much as you thought they would. Perhaps your mother or mother-in-law has made comments about it “not being that hard” and can be dismissive about the realities of twin care. Maybe you have a strained relationship with your partner because of the lack of sleep and not being able to get on the same page with responsibilities and tasks. The never-ending to-do list does not seem to have space for your own needs and care.
Therapy for twin moms can help you prioritize your mental health so you can show up as a more resourced parent.
Double the Demands for Parents of Multiples
With the rise of assisted reproductive technologies and people having children later in life, the number of multiples births is on the rise. About 3% of the births in the U.S. are multiples births.* What’s more, we know that perinatal mental health conditions are the #1 complication of childbearing, with 1 in 5 women and 1 in 10 men being affected.^ We also know that one of the risk factors for developing a perinatal mood disorder is being a parent of multiples.
You’re not alone if you’ve been struggling in this transition to twin parenthood, yet it can feel like you’re not a “good enough” mother or there’s something wrong with you as a twin mom if you need support. This fear of judgment from others can make it even harder to ask for help, especially for dads and partners. The reality is that parents of multiples need double the support.
The Messy, Beautiful Chaos of Raising Twins
Parenting twins is an extraordinary journey, but it also comes with unique challenges, particularly in the first few years. From the sleepless nights with two crying babies to the constant demands of feeding, diapering, and soothing, twin parents often find themselves stretched thin. It’s completely normal to feel both immense love and occasional frustration, to celebrate small victories while also wondering if you’re doing enough.
The reality is, parenting twins is tough, and feeling drained or struggling to keep up doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re human. Mothers of multiples often feel pressure to "do it all" when faced with comparisons to parents of singletons or societal expectations of effortless parenting. Balancing the needs of two growing individuals while maintaining your own well-being is a learning curve, and the moment you have it figured out, there’s a new developmental phase to contend with.
The good news is that with the help of a compassionate, trained reproductive therapist (who is also a fellow twin parent), you can develop new coping skills to manage the overwhelm and decrease your stress.
You Can Find Calm Amidst the Chaos With Therapy for Twin Parents
We know that parents of multiples have higher rates of mental health struggles, and talk therapy is an evidence-based treatment to help you cope. As a reproductive mental health specialist, I combine my extensive training on fertility, perinatal mood disorders, and the postpartum adjustment with a measured, compassionate approach.
Whether you just found out you’re having twins, newly postpartum, or you’re in the throes of parenting, counseling for twin parents can help you to address the unique parenting concerns such as balancing attention between twins, fostering individuality, and managing sibling rivalry.
The Training and Experience to Support Your Healing
I have specialized training in reproductive mental health, most notably with a Maternal Mental Health Certificate for Clinical Providers from Postpartum Support International. I’m a professional member of Postpartum Support International and the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM).
On a personal note, I am a twin parent and navigated postpartum during the Covid-19 pandemic.
What to Expect From Our Work Together
At Well Parent Therapy, I use a variety of techniques and modalities to support your healing. My practice is relational and psychodynamic, with a focus on attachment theory and strength-based approaches. This means that we work together to explore how your early life has shaped your current patterns and then use your natural strengths to help you gain better understanding and shift unwanted behaviors.
Each session is carefully tailored to meet you where you are, ensuring that the support you get is as unique and dynamic as your parenting journey. I also incorporate practical, accessible coping skills tailored to the realities of being a parent of multiples. Depending on your needs and symptoms, I draw on evidence-based approaches during therapy sessions such as:
Narrative Therapy
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
Interpersonal Therapy (IPT)
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy (EMDR)
With the help of a supportive and experienced therapist for twin parents, we’ll explore your experiences in a way that normalizes your feelings and helps you feel truly seen and heard by someone who understands. You’ll be able to openly discuss any feelings of guilt, frustration, or inadequacy, allowing for healthy emotional expression. My goal is to help you release shame and self-blame, creating a compassionate and empowering space for growth.
You May Still Have Questions About Counseling for Twin Parents
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Understandably, you feel stretched thin during this time! A couple of things that could help with the scheduling: One is that babies are always welcome during our sessions; you’re free to feed your babies or do other care tasks as needed. Two is that we can do online therapy sessions instead of in-office visits; some parents schedule these during their babies’ naps or when a partner or parent can take over for 50 minutes. Therapy is an investment in your well-being and your family’s future. You are worth the support.
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Unfortunately, there is still a stigma around mental health treatment, especially among certain communities and cultures. But seeking therapy doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent—quite the opposite! It means you’re prioritizing your wellness and showing up for yourself and your family in the best way possible. Learning to prioritize your own well-being enhances your ability to care for your children effectively. While you can’t control what others think, you can control the steps you take to feel better, and that is a powerful act.
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I get it, as raising multiples is an expensive endeavor. If you do have health insurance, many plans offer reimbursement for services from an out-of-network provider, especially once you reach your deductible. You can do an instant benefits check here to see if you can get reimbursed for a portion of your therapy costs. Some potential clients also find it helpful to reflect on what the costs will be of not getting support, on yourself, your relationships, and your desired future.
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Therapist fit is extremely important to therapeutic outcomes, so you're smart to try to find a therapist who gets it. Many therapists specialize in counseling for parenting and reproductive mental health, including myself. I also know the importance of working with a provider with lived experience as a twin parent, which is why I am so passionate about specializing in this population. Research, recommendations from your OB/GYN or friends, and initial consultations can help ensure you find a good fit.
Gain Clarity and Confidence While Navigating the Unique Challenges of This Season
You don’t have to live the early years of your twins’ lives feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, and guilty. I can help you shift your twin parenting experience. If you’d like to schedule an initial consultation or discuss any questions you may have regarding counseling for twin parents in Los Angeles, I invite you to reach out by clicking on the buttons below.